Parent watching stressed teen carrying books.

Helping kids cope with exam stress

Exam stress can be really challenging, not only for kids but also for those who live with them!

Here are some ideas about how to help.

When your child faces exams, often scheduled close together, they are under incredible pressure.

They’ll need your understanding and support.
Here’s some aspects of exam stress you might not have considered:

The words pressure and stress are used interchangeably but are actually quite different
Pressure can be challenging, but positive and motivating overall
Stress feels negative and can get in the way of performing well
Each child responds differently to exam stress and pressure

What is exam stress? What causes it?

Stress is a negative reaction to excessive pressure or other demands. Exam stress can be caused by:

Anxiety

Fear of failure or not being good enough.

Pessimism

Thinking about the worst case scenarios.

Expectations

Unrealistic expectations on themselves, or feeling pressured by others.

Unprepared

Feeling unprepared, wishing they had more time or had done more in the lead up to exams.

Timing

Exams often fall at the end or start of a school term or year, adding extra stress around changes and transitions.

Grades

Performance anxiety, and stress around grades and marks.

What to expect when exam stress hits

Your child may openly express how stressed they’re feeling. Or they may hold it in and try to cope on their own. These are some signs they may be under stress:

Blaming others, anger or frustration
Difficulty making decisions
Problems going to sleep or waking up
Racing heart and sweating
Mild chest tightness or pain
Nausea or minor stomach upsets
Skin breakouts
Teeth grinding, nail biting and fidgeting
Increased smoking, drinking or drug use
Losing touch with friends
Feeling cranky and irritable (increased yelling, crying, swearing, lashing out)
Feeling or thinking negatively about the future

“Exams can be a challenging part of your child’s life. If they are struggling it can help to talk to a counsellor about what you can do as a parent."

How can kids manage their exam stress?

One of the challenges as a parent is that exams are something your child has to do on their own. But you can support them by trying the following:

Teach them the importance of study breaks
Be constructive and positive
Encourage good sleep patterns and eating habits
Provide a quiet space for them to study and prepare
Having realistic expectations and not pushing them too hard
Encourage them to ask the teacher questions if they’re unsure
Help them know what to expect on the day of the exam
Help them be on time for the exam or arrive early
After the exam, listen to their concerns and avoid criticising them

Parenting your child while they're going through exams can be tough, but we're here to help them.

If exam stress is paralysing your child, you can seek further help through your local doctor or school counsellor.

They may also benefit from letting out their stress by talking with a Kids Helpline counsellor. Encourage them to give us a call or start a webchat to get respectful and confidential support.