Dealing with grief
18 year old female
In 2009, a very close friend of mine committed suicide. When we were younger, she'd confided in me that her dad was sexually abusing her, but had asked me not to tell anyone. I was scared and confused, so I did as she asked. For a long time, I blamed myself for her death. I wanted to talk about how I was feeling and how guilty I felt, and I decided to try talking to someone at Kids Helpline.
Through several chats with my regular counsellors, I began to realise that I was not to blame for my friend's decision and I started to give myself permission to grieve without feeling guilty. One good idea that was brought up during one call was that perhaps I should focus in on the good memories of my friend, rather than just on the bad things that happened to her. I have since been able to remember my friend in a much more positive way. I have also learned that grief is really confusing, but the way that I feel is right for me. It's OK to laugh at a funny memory of my friend and also be really sad that she's gone. Thanks Kids Helpline!
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